This piece first appeared as a Facebook post on my public page 'Regina Leeds, The Zen Organizer' on Father's Day, 2013. I wanted to share it with a wider audience and remind all parents no matter their sex that there is power in our words. Indeed we all need to be mindful how we speak to each other not just our children. And let's not forget the power of the written word! The comments you leave anonymously on Social Media sites can sting the recipient for a lifetime. Make it your goal to uplift, encourage and support. We already have more than enough negativity to go around!
Many years ago when I was tinkering with my first book I joined a women's group. We decided to meet for one year and learn about money management. We began by sharing stories of our childhoods and how we learned about money. The stories were hilarious. It's as if no one ever gave a formal lesson in how finances work. You were supposed to learn it all by osmosis.
But over and over again a theme emerged from each of these stories: the women had never or rarely been told they were pretty or smart by their dads. I was lucky because my dad told me those things every day of his life. He wasn't perfect. I'm not putting him on one of those 'perfect pedestal' we create after someone dies to make them mythic. But his words rang in my head when I made the transition from actress and organizer to organizer and writer. I was terrified. But I heard him in my head clearly saying: "Regina, you are smart. You can do anything you put your mind to."
On this Father's Day I ask all daddies of little girls to tell them how pretty, smart and capable they are. You are the first man in her life. She will carry your opinion of her forever. It will shape the choices she makes. Thanks, gentlemen, for listening to a grateful daughter. And oh yeah teach her about money, OK?
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Photo is by Mischa Bolton Photography.
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