The 'Stuff' of life and the chaos it creates

I've spent more than twenty years helping people eliminate the 'excess stuff' they've accumulated. But it isn't just 'stuff' that needs to go from the physical environment. From time to time it's also people, places or jobs.

We sometimes hold onto relationships for years after they have ended. We all know one sided friendships or marriages that are dead. We witness destructive relationships that seem to go on forever. What's the old saying? 'The devil you know is better than the one you don't.' This was no doubt stated by someone who was frozen with fear. After all, what if the devil got his walking papers and a bevy of angels was invited in to stay?

There's a law of physics that states that two objects can not occupy the same space at the same time. You won't have more nurturing friends, a better love relationship or a great workplace if you don't create the space. I'm not suggesting you wake up tomorrow and do a wholesale cleaning of your life. I am suggesting you take some time to examine every aspect of your life and see if something needs to be eliminated. You may discover what needs to be done is some serious nurturing of current relationships whether they be personal or professional.

I helped a client recently who had some plants. She adored them. She simply forgot to care for them on a regular basis. She found it heartwarming to see how quickly they could bounce back with a little water. I suggested she nurture them on a regular basis so that they didn't have to come back from the brink every few weeks. There's a metaphor for life in this story. Do you nurture your relationships on a regular basis? Do you nurture yourself by creating an environment that supports you on every level? Or are you the kind of person who senses distance in your friends and rushes in with last minute invitations to dinner? Does your home get so messy you have to tidy up every few weekends?  Do you wonder why the order you created never lasts? Only long term and consistent care will create the results you want whether it's people or places.

I had to walk away from a long term friendship recently. Something happened that hurt me deeply. When I examined the relationship I realized that for several years it had been falling apart. Had we been honest we would have seen the hand writing on the wall and parted years ago. My environment 'speaks' to me in much the same way. I look around and suddenly something I treasured and loved looks old or out of place. I realize I've outgrown the item. And then I have the fun of replacing it with something that reflects who I am in this moment. If the original object is still in great condition I can compound my fun by giving it to someone else. Now even the object has a fresh start.

I took a leap of faith when I created my organizing business. I took another when I decided to write my first book. Both have developed in ways I could never have imagined. These leaps of faith have given me experiences, friends and creative fulfillment beyond my wildest imagination. I never considered that my business would take off and I'd be organizing 21 years later. Nor could I possible have dreamed that I'd one day be writing my 8th book.

What can you eliminate that may open the door to greater possibilities?